it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Randomize
