I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize