brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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