That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
