Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5 (312): Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy http://tfl.nu/43t9
  Replies (2) Good night (980) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up" http://tfl.nu/ev4p
  Replies (2) Good night (3049) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  then i met college

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton (781): then i met college http://tfl.nu/kd7x
  Replies (17) Good night (6266) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real http://tfl.nu/fl2e
  Replies (63) Good night (6233) Bad night (867)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag. http://tfl.nu/vhx8
  Replies (8) Good night (4994) Bad night (1074)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (212): It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis http://tfl.nu/3xfb
  Replies (13) Good night (2533) Bad night (1228)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love. http://tfl.nu/9ope
  Replies (7) Good night (2462) Bad night (759)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life... http://tfl.nu/cy2e
  Replies (5) Good night (1105) Bad night (2869)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me. http://tfl.nu/x609
  Replies (5) Good night (2499) Bad night (779)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism. http://tfl.nu/d72k
  Replies (1) Good night (1604) Bad night (437)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable. http://tfl.nu/pa6u
  Replies (6) Good night (654) Bad night (1779)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life. http://tfl.nu/e384
  Replies (6) Good night (1576) Bad night (389)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to. http://tfl.nu/rk2y
  Replies (5) Good night (600) Bad night (1251)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me. http://tfl.nu/mqtk
  Replies (3) Good night (619) Bad night (252)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad. http://tfl.nu/b7v4
  Replies (5) Good night (468) Bad night (346)

Randomize