just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
