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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  oh good, I think they're gone

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  the painters?

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  my herpes

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• (909): View more from California

  It must have been true love

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime

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• (315): View more from New York

  You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning

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• (323): View more from California

  He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (250): View more from British Columbia

  we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.

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• (432): View more from Texas

  Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.

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• (631): View more from New York

  So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.

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• (386): View more from Florida

  Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.

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