I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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