So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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