Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
