The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
