But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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