Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Randomize
