New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize