Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
