6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
