But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
