think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Randomize
