I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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