I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize