are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
