On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I had to cum in my sink.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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