I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
