so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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