Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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