I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Dating After Heartbreak
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since