Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
