I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
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my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
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But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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