I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
