ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
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