Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Prob not but she was surprised

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  (773): When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate" (312): Prob not but she was surprised http://tfl.nu/a9jx
  Replies (2) Good night (1613) Bad night (595)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.

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  (205): I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs. http://tfl.nu/uuhy
  Replies (10) Good night (1589) Bad night (472)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.

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  (207): I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy. http://tfl.nu/9ve4
  Replies (19) Good night (568) Bad night (3714)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.

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  (412): Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken. http://tfl.nu/9881
  Replies (13) Good night (893) Bad night (5240)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.

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  (772): remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night. http://tfl.nu/s4kw
  Replies (11) Good night (3448) Bad night (1178)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.

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  (214): I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday. http://tfl.nu/w2er
  Replies (24) Good night (1950) Bad night (5062)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata

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  (404): And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata http://tfl.nu/65h3
  Replies (4) Good night (2188) Bad night (1257)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars

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  (228): There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars http://tfl.nu/ue2i
  Replies (4) Good night (3103) Bad night (748)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...

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  (907): Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning... http://tfl.nu/hr8v
  Replies (5) Good night (2993) Bad night (1265)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.

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  (773): You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend. http://tfl.nu/u6sb
  Replies (7) Good night (2768) Bad night (582)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it

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  (317): So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it http://tfl.nu/80uu
  Replies (7) Good night (4918) Bad night (853)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.

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  (602): If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for. http://tfl.nu/540a
  Replies (17) Good night (1664) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE

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  (847): The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking. (312): Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE http://tfl.nu/m86e
  Replies (1) Good night (838) Bad night (356)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out

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  (513): you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out http://tfl.nu/zkkx
  Replies (7) Good night (364) Bad night (878)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.

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  (217): Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack. http://tfl.nu/wwoa
  Replies (3) Good night (766) Bad night (223)

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