Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
ttyl tear gas
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
