Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize