I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
