new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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