I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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