She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
