so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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