I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
