Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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