quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
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He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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