Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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