what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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