Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize