Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize