You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
Drunk walkin through police station. America
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
