Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
