O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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