I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.