Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize