I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
